Bonjour!!!
Tis been a bit init? Well April has been a busy one for sure, I had a little get away and time out for myself which was amazing! We all need a bit of change of location in order to get a better perspective of things, even if you are unable to get off this Island (UK) there are so many places within that can make it feel like you are abroad...(What you waiting for? GO!!)...I ended up in the South of France, which I totally fell in love with.
One thing that I did not expect to hit me, was the fact that it was so chilled out, laid back and ever so friendly not to mention the stunning scenery! However what more struck me was the fact during the week as I sat alone on beach one afternoon I saw a lot of families also chilling out, both parents plus kids...just hanging out. As I sat there gazing into the French Riviera....shit....I was feeling broody! I have to say I have cousins with plenty of children who I love and adore but it was not until that point it really hit me, Id so love to have a mini me of my own....I was a bit taken aback at the thought of this as I never really sat and thought about it. As I sat on the sandy beach....did it finally hit me that the sands of time where ticking away?
Upon my return, as always I had to go into full swing wedding mode as my beautiful baby cousin was to be getting married. So as always dashing between work, home and all over east London throughout the week and weekend...I was pretty much all over the show. During my all over the show week, I was in my local supermarket, and I heard two familiar voices. I turned around and saw that it was my primary school friend's parents....I finished up with my shopping and approached them....its had been a year since I had seen them. See the thing is.....I had not seen them since my friend had passed away.. and when I saw them I did feel guilty......I greeted both of them with big tight hugs....I dint expect to bump into them and it brought a whole bag of mixed emotions....As always they where smiley and greeted me with such love and warmth.....from that point onwards with all my might I had to contain and restrain myself from shedding a tear in front of them as I could feel myself wanting to burst. As I asked how they where, it struck me how amazing they truly are and still how they speak of my dear friend.....The unconditional love parents have for their children....it touched me so deeply. Their strength was what touched me the most, my friend was a few months older than me and had everything going for him. What pained me the most, he was meant to be getting married last year in the summer. However mash'Allah he did manage to get married and have that wish fulfilled. Seeing my friends parents made me think a lot....we take advantage of time, we never know what is around the corner. It made me think of my own parents, and their worries for me, how ever never really speak about it and things are brushed under the carpet, but its like their worries and concerns are there just not spoken about. I came across an article on the Huffimgton Post...about a guy called Shalin...(I don't want this post to be about sadness....just about seize the day, when we think we have it bad, always try and see the good that the day had brought). All I shall say, is his quote had me at this:
''Shalin Shah's Last Wish Is That People Treasure Life And See All The Sunsets''
I read his story, and with the past week with my emotions running high and all over the place reading his story made me wish people where more fearless and free. I think in this day and age everyone is so cautious and not willing to let go to embrace their true feelings and thoughts. I think this is why I have always had the attitude to never give up, to never have ''what if's''....I guess I also live by ''If you don't ask, you don't get'' attitude. But this has also lead me to believe to make your own happiness each day, be it the smallest thing like treating yourself in any small way you can...each day. I take comfort in the fact that I can make myself happy, and that I can enjoy my own company. Thinking about it, if I am to wonder this planet alone, I can see it and accept that fact.
Enough of my waffling about all this...(Wish I did have a hot waffle though, with ice cream too!).
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